Motherhood is a wild ride. Equal parts magical and maddening. One minute, you’re soaking in the sweetness of bedtime snuggles, and the next, you’re trying not to lose it because someone spilled an entire smoothie on the couch again. It’s easy to feel like you need something to take the edge off. That’s where Mommy Wine Culture swoops in, whispering promises of “relaxation” and “me time” in the form of a glass (or three) of wine. And for a while, I believed it. I thought a drink at the end of the day would help me be a better mom, more patient, more fun, less overwhelmed. Spoiler alert: it didn’t. Instead, it left me more drained, more irritable, and less present with my kids. Sobriety changed all of that. Here’s 5 ways sobriety made me a more present and patient mom.
Motherhood Without Alcohol
1. I Stopped Running From The Hard Moments
Motherhood is full of tough moments. Tantrums, endless messes, and the never-ending “Mom, watch this!” loop. When I was drinking, I used alcohol to escape the stress, but all it did was delay my ability to deal with it. Sobriety forced me to sit with the discomfort, process it, and actually handle it instead of numbing out.
2. I Became a Better Listener
Let’s be real, kids have a lot to say. And when I was drinking, I wasn’t really listening. My mind was foggy, my patience was thin, and I was often counting down the minutes until bedtime so I could have a drink. Now, I hear them. I really hear them. And that has deepened my connection with my children in ways I never expected.
3. Mornings Became Easier (and Happier)
There’s nothing like waking up groggy, dehydrated, and instantly irritated because your kid is asking for breakfast at what feels like the crack of dawn. Sobriety gave me my mornings back. Instead of waking up in a fog, I wake up with energy. I’m present, I’m engaged, and I’m no longer counting down the hours until nap time just so I can “recover.”
4. I Became a Role Model for Emotional Regulation
Kids learn by watching us. When I was reaching for a drink to “cope,” I was unknowingly teaching my kids that hard feelings should be numbed instead of worked through. Now, I show them how to handle stress in healthy ways, whether it’s deep breaths, a walk outside, or simply acknowledging that yes, sometimes life feels overwhelming, and that’s okay.
5. I Found Real Joy in the Everyday Moments
Sobriety didn’t just make me more patient. It made me more present. I used to rush through bedtime routines, eager to get to my wine and Netflix. Now, I savor the moments. The bedtime snuggles, the silly stories, the giggles. I’m not just there with my kids, I’m truly with them. And that? That’s the best gift sobriety has given me.
Alcohol isn’t the magical ingredient in motherhood, you are. I hope these 5 ways sobriety made me a more present and patient mom has inspired you in your sobriety.
I created The Sober Mom Life Café so women could have a safe space to explore their relationship with alcohol and find freedom in sobriety. We have Zoom Peer Support meetings every single day, sometimes multiple meetings a day. You felt alone in your drinking. You don’t have to feel alone in sobriety.
Click below to try the Cafe FREE for one week.
